Nora's Birth Story

I had a feeling all day Thursday, December 11, that I would have the baby the next day. My back was feeling a little different than it had been, and there was a feeling I couldn't explain telling me Friday was the day. 

I went to sleep and woke up when Knox came to my bed. He climbed up, curled up between my legs, and fell asleep like that. I noticed Cody wasn't in bed. He must have fallen asleep in the living room. I checked the clock...it was 2:30. I decided to get up and go to the bathroom. 

When I came back to bed, I bent over to try to scoot Knox over. My water broke. I yelled at Cody so I didn't make a mess all over the carpet. He came in and brought some towels. I wasn't feeling any contractions so I texted my midwife just to let her know. She had told me that she would be in Branson with her grandkids Thursday and Friday, so I wanted to give her a head's up. 

I decided to try to get some rest before my contractions started. It didn't work. Around the time I laid down (about 30 minutes after my water broke), the contractions started. I tried to time them, but I don't think I was doing it right. They were pretty close together...between 2 and 4 minutes apart. I didn't think that was right, but they were never further apart than that so I guess I skipped the early contractions. 

I never got back to sleep, so instead, I got the last minute stuff ready and just kept myself moving. Cody went in to the school to get sub plans ready. 

Around 7:00, we called my midwife for an update. The contractions were strong, but still not too strong. I didn't want to make the 1 hour+ trip while in hard labor, so we decided to head that way around 7:30. 

Cody's mom came over and stayed with Knox. He was still asleep. I was hoping he would wake up so we could explain what was happening, but he didn't. 

We got to the birth center at 8:45. My midwife was going to send her assistant to check me, and then decide if she needed to come yet or not. When we got inside and settled, she checked me and said I was between 4 and 5 cm. I still had a while. 

The assistant left to run some errands and let me progress on my own. I tried to eat something, but after I took one bite of yogurt, I felt like I was going to throw up. I got a couple of grapes down and decided to stop trying.

I tried laying down to rest, and the contractions got a lot stronger. It felt way better when I was upright and moving around, so I got up. The best position I found was sitting on the edge of a rocking chair. I was able to kind of rock my way through each contraction. 

Around 11:00, I got in the shower because the contractions were a lot stronger. It helped me relax and get to that next level of contractions. 

When I got out, I got on the birthing ball and bounced, rolled, etc. The assistant was back by then and checked me again. I was at 6 cm. Getting there! I was doing well getting through the contractions. I felt focused and relaxed, remembering how to breathe and using Cody to help me. 

This is when chaos broke out. I was on the ball still and a lady came in the room. She introduced herself as the doctor that oversees the birth center. She explained that in Missouri, nurse midwives have to have a doctor to 'okay' every birth they take on. She then said that she didn't know anything about me. She asked me a lot of questions about my last pregnancy, health background, etc. I could tell there was some tension in the room, as she was not being very pleasant toward Cody and I or the assistant. I tried answering the questions, but I was having contractions every minute and a half or so, and they were very strong. When I did have a contraction, she would rudely say, "I'll wait..." So Cody answered most of the questions. She left the room to go over all the information we gave her. 

When she came back in, she said she did not feel comfortable letting me attempt a VBAC at the birth center. She started going over options, explaining that there were plenty of doctors in Springfield who would let me attempt a VBAC. But, at that point, we were no longer welcome to have the baby at the birth center. Cody was mad. He was calmly arguing with her. I was still on the birthing ball. I kept my eyes closed and focused on breathing through the contractions. They were getting very strong and getting closer together. The doctor finally said, "well, you're the one who is in labor. Can you share what you're thinking?" 

Hmm...what I'm thinking? I was thinking, "who do we know in Springfield who would let us have a baby at their house?" and, "could I make the drive home without having the baby in the car?" and plenty of bad thoughts toward the doctor. However, the only word I could get out was, "no," because, frankly, I share my thoughts with people who care about me. And if you are going to throw me out on the street when I could deliver a baby at any moment, you don't deserve to know what I'm thinking. 

I finally told her to leave, that we needed a minute to talk in private. She left, and my midwife's assistant apologized greatly, telling me they had somewhere for me to go if I didn't want to go to the hospital. I knew that if I walked into a hospital at this point in labor, no doctor would want to take the risk of a VBAC with a patient they've never met before, and I would surely end up with another cesarean. So I got enough strength up to say, "I don't want to go to the hospital." 

With those words, we flew into crazy mode. We packed things up (and I use the word 'we' very loosely. I definitely was not much help at that point), and Cody took everything to the car. The assistant helped me walk out to the car. Although it was a short walk, I had to stop several times for contractions. The doctor was prying us for information as we were leaving, wanting to know where we were going. Again, she did not deserve to know that information. 

As we got to the car, my midwife pulled into the parking lot. We found out later that she and her husband got pulled over trying to get there. She went inside and surely had some words with the doctor. We got in the car, with the assistant in the back seat to help me through contractions. She pushed on my back where I had a lot of pressure. 

She apologized, saying we had a 30-minute drive. As Cody pulled onto the road, I said, "don't tell our parents what we're doing!" 

That was a long car ride! I was still calm, breathing through the contractions. But every little bump felt like a crater! Our car is so tiny, so there wasn't much room to move around. 

We got to a house. Our midwife knew this lady from when she was a doula. She opened her home to us and was happy to help with the birth. She had her master suite ready for us as we got there, with fresh sheets on the bed and her big tub cleaned. 

My midwife wanted to check my dilation. I was standing and hugging Cody around the neck. She checked me standing, which was great since I didn't feel like I could move. I was dilated to 8, but my cervix started firming up a little from the stress of everything. I had broke down just a little once we got there, but I think it could have been a lot worse :)

I remember standing with my hip popped to the side, and I just couldn't relax. I said I felt like I had to pee, so I got to the toilet, which helped relax me too. All of the sudden, I thought I was going to puke. I looked around and couldn't find a trash can. My midwife kept trying to keep me calm, saying this is good--it meant I was in transition. 

After the nausea passed, I got in the tub. It helped me relax, but not for long. The contractions were SO strong with SO much pressure. Cody got his trunks on and got in the tub to help with positions. 

I was feeling sooo much pressure that I thought I had to push. I kept the thought to myself for a second, because I was kind of waiting for someone to tell me to push. That sounds so stupid now, but that's what all the shows you watch make it seem like. I finally said, "I feel like I need to push!"

My midwife said, "good! Then push!" 

"I can push?!?"

"YES!" 

So with the next contraction, I pushed. It felt better than holding it in. I pushed for a while, but I wasn't doing an effective job. My midwife coached me through some. I kept getting so hot in the tub. I drank a lot of water and used cool rags on my forehead and neck.  I felt like I couldn't breathe! I also couldn't get a good grip with my feet, so we finally got out of the tub so I could get in a better position for pushing.  

Cody sat on the edge of the tub with his legs spread. I squatted down between his legs, facing away from him. I rested my arms on his legs and he held my arms to keep me up. I pushed for not very long like this, and finally felt the stinging feeling my childbirth instructor told me about. I kept reminding myself that even though it was a tearing feeling, it's really just my body going numb and it won't last long. 

My midwife had me reach down and feel Nora's head. I couldn't believe she was so close to being in my arms! A couple more pushes, and Nora came flying out! My midwife put her in my arms and I was immediately in love! The first words out of my mouth were, "oh, she looks like Knox!!" 

I sat down the rest of the way on the floor, and I held Nora until the cord stopped pulsing. Cody cut the cord. 

Then we made our way to the bed to deliver the placenta. Holy crap! Why doesn't anyone make a big deal about that? I remember telling everyone that it's not fair that you still have to do work after you just had a baby. 

During all of that, the assistant worked with Nora to get her latched on. She was so patient and Nora latched on like a champ. 

After my midwife checked to make sure the placenta was intact, she actually let us see it. It is amazing how our bodies make such a safe place for the baby to live for ten months. A miracle for sure. 

We were planning on going home right away, but it was such a crazy turn of events that we decided to stay the night. They went and got us burgers and fries, then left us to enjoy Nora alone the rest of the evening. I cannot get over the generosity and hospitality of everyone. We were blessed to have met them! 

Although my concept of time was gone throughout the whole day (time seemed to fly by actually!), here's a rough estimate of how things went. We left the birth center around 1:45, got to the house around 2:15, and Nora was born at 3:44. I started pushing maybe 30 minutes after we got there. It was super fast after we got settled. 

I am so happy with my midwife and her assistant, and feel like they were wonderful given the situation. The only person I fault for everything that happened is the doctor at the birth center. She was rude and negligent. Things could have gone so differently, and I'm thankful they didn't! I will never understand why she treated us the way she did, and how someone like that can live with themselves. We will never stop telling people about this, hoping they don't get treated the same way. 

Anyway, overall, I'm happy with everything. I finally got the natural birth I have always wanted. I got to experience it in a unique way to say the least! And it turns out that I had a home birth after all.  I can't wait to do it again...although, next time, I think we will try a home birth at our own home :D 

Pregnancy and Family Update

Lots of people have been asking when I'm going to have this baby, how I'm feeling, or just how our family is doing. 

First, I have NO idea when this little girl will make her appearance in the world. I think most everyone knows that I'm opting for a natural birth with a midwife this time around. So unless there is a major problem, she will come when she and my body is ready! What I do know is that my due date is December 9, and my midwife will let me go two weeks (longer if everything looks good and healthy) past my due date. So anytime in the next few weeks :) 

I have been feeling ok, but am getting a little uncomfortable. On thanksgiving day, I started having cramping and my belly would tighten (maybe Braxton Hicks?). I've also been nesting. Cody and I spent all day Thursday cleaning and organizing. I've been getting last minute items packed, bows and headbands made for the little girl, and finishing decorating the nursery. 

One popular question I get over and over is, "are you ready?" The answer is yes and no! I am ready to see this little baby, hold her, and give her lots of kisses. BUT I still feel a little hesitation about the unknown--how will the birth go? How will breastfeeding go? How will Knox react? And I still have a few things I need to get done, like making up some freezer meals ahead of time. 

Everyone is doing great in our family. Cody is done with football season, which has made my life a lot easier! Knox is talking SO much and learning a lot. He loves learning shapes and colors. He also likes counting (he can count to 13 now) and singing (some of his favorite songs are the ABC's, Itsy Bitsy Spider, Jesus Loves Me, and The Wheels on the Bus). It's so funny to hear what little phrases he picks up on and uses. 

Over the summer, we were on a mission to get Knox to sleep in his own bed, seeing as how we will have a newborn in bed with us soon and all four of us wouldn't fit in a queen bed comfortably. We moved his toddler bed into our room and put it right next to my side of the bed. I think it helped ease him into sleeping by himself, and if he got scared or had a bad dream in the night, he could just climb up and spend the rest of the night with us. To get him to sleep, I would lay him in bed with me, read a book, and then sing to him until he or I fell asleep :) Cody would then move him down to his bed when he came to bed. We had gotten really bad about falling asleep and not moving him or just leaving him in bed with us the last month or so (partly because he had a bad cough and wasn't breathing the greatest). 

I haven't been sleeping very well at all with him in bed with us--between his crazy sleeping positions and me being so big, it was very uncomfortable. So I decided the first day of thanksgiving break to try to get him to sleep in his own room. I made it seem like it was his idea and he got really excited. We moved his bed back in his room. The first night he slept all night in his bed, so I made a Mickey Mouse (his favorite) sticker chart. He got to put a Mickey Mouse sticker on it and watch an episode of Mickey Mouse when he woke up. When it was nap time that day, I explained to him that he needed to rest, that he didn't have to sleep but he couldn't come out of his room. I checked on him about 15 minutes later and he was awake still. I held him for a minute and then laid him back down. He fell right to sleep! He has now slept in his room all night for the last 3 nights, and has taken 2 naps in his room with little effort to get him to sleep. 

I can't believe how big he is getting! I do miss snuggling with him at night but I also have enjoyed the extra space in bed. I'm hoping this new sleeping arrangement sticks when the new baby gets here. I'm afraid he will be jealous that she gets to sleep with us. Although it wasn't always the most comfortable waking up with Knox kicking me in the ribs or smacking me in the face, I wouldn't change anything about it. Being a working mom, it seems like I miss out on spending time with him some days. Just having the extra 8 (or so) hours of snuggles at night help make up for that a little bit. 

Some thoughts on Amendment 3...

Picture this:

You work for your local, hometown bank as a drive-thru teller. It's the end of the month and you are meeting with your boss to discuss your performance. 

Boss: "I'm afraid I'm going to have to cut your pay this month"

You: "Why? Did I do something wrong?"

Boss: "It seems like you didn't take in many deposits this month. We have to have more deposits to be able to function."

You: "You're kidding, right? I can't control how many people come through the drive-thru to make a deposit."

Boss: "I'm sorry, but I'm not kidding. This is our new policy. The amount you are getting paid will depend on how many deposits your customers make each month."

As you could imagine, you are very disappointed. The amount of money you depend on to support your family is not there anymore. But there's nothing you can do now. You go home, and over the next month, you study. You learn new strategies for your customers. You take books home on how to become a better banker. You read and read and read, look up new techniques until you can't stare at a computer screen anymore. You dream about banking. You spend your evenings, normally devoted to family time, with your nose in a book. You feel more prepared than ever before. You go into your boss' office the next month, expecting great results. 

Boss: "It looks like there has been no change this month. In fact, your deposits are down again. Looks like I'll be cutting your pay again."

You: "I have worked so hard to get my deposits up! This can't be fair! I've done everything in my power to become a better teller. I am not in control of how much my customers deposit."

Boss: "Betty hasn't had any troubles getting high deposits each month."

You try to explain that Betty is inside, where all the big businesses go for deposits, that the drive-thru is where people go for quick service with their little deposits, that maybe because it's around Christmas time people don't have much money to deposit, but there's nothing he can do. This was a policy set in place by someone much higher up than him. And although he does not agree, he must abide by it.

This, essentially, is what will happen to teachers in Missouri if Amendment 3 passes in November. Our pay would be determined by how well our 'customers' (students) are performing. For me personally, that would mean that 6- and 7-year-olds would be setting my salary.  How scary is that?

Let's take this a little bit at a time, because there is a lot covered on this Amendment. (By the way, you can read the exact language here.)

If passed, teachers would be evaluated by a standards-based evaluation system. Basically, there will be a set of standards that each teacher must achieve to be considered a competent teacher. We are already evaluated each year, so this doesn't change *much* when it comes to our jobs. It will be a more thorough list of standards we must meet each year. However, state and local funding will be based off of these evaluations. Although I'm not how this will be assessed, I don't necessarily agree that funding be based off of teacher evaluations (I'm assuming they will use this as motivation to get 'bad' teachers out of schools.)

Next, if passed, teachers will be "dismissed, retained, demoted, promoted, and paid primarily using quantifiable student performance data as part of the evaluation system." This is what the first part of my post was about. This is my 6th year teaching, and while I finally feel comfortable and confident in my career, I know it is not long in the grand scheme of things. However, I think back on my 6 years of teaching, and I can vividly remember groups of students who tested me as a teacher. Some were SO SMART, but could not focus when it came around to test time. Some groups were so low academically that I knew I would never get them all to where they needed to be by the end of the year. Some groups had such bad behaviors that the rest of the class suffered. However, one thing remains the same each year...our end-of-year scores fluctuate. I always have good surprises and bad surprises. I would never, ever want my salary to be based off of what a piece of paper says. And it's not because I feel like I am a lazy teacher who just wants to sneak by under the radar. I work my butt off for every one of my kids. When one struggles, I rack my brain and everyone else's brains until I find something that works. But in the end, I know the score on that paper tells me nothing about the person who completed the test. I know my students better than any test or government official ever will.

Here are some things to think about. There are some secondary teachers who teach all advanced classes, and some who teach basic classes. Who do you think will get paid more? What are we going to do for the Art teachers, who do not give a standardized test at the end of the year? Will we start making tests for everything? Music, P.E., library, etc.? Come on, people, it's not realistic!

And finally, if passed, this Amendment would require teachers to enter into contracts of three years or fewer with school districts. This is to get rid of tenure. I am not yet a tenured teacher, so I don't know what the feeling of being tenured is like. I think most of the public thinks being tenured means you can't get rid of a bad teacher. That is not what it is! You still have to hold up your end of the contract as a tenured teacher. It is not impossible to get rid of a teacher who is not teaching. Period. Tenure does, however, make it impossible to get rid of a teacher for no reason. As a non-tenured teacher, technically I can be told at any moment that I don't have a job next year and they don't have to give me a reason. Yes, I understand that any other job has the same risk. However, in our line of work, a school board (who generally has no background in education) has the ultimate decision on whether or not you will get your contract renewed (yes, most listen to the advice from administrators, but the ultimate decision rests in the hands of the school board).

While talking to a teacher friend last night about tenure, she told me that tenure gives you the security to stand up for what you believe without fearing your job will be on the line. She said that she recently fought for a student (which teachers do ALL the time), saying things she believed would best benefit the student even though no one else agreed. Without tenure, who will fight for the students? Who will stand up to do the right thing when no one else agrees?

I recently posted a video to Facebook about a bill that is trying to be passed in Missouri to prohibit teachers from getting involved in any sort of political activity. If you missed the video, click here to watch it. It is very disturbing that this was even a thought that crossed a politician's mind. Are they seeing how teachers are fighting back against Amendment 3, scared it won't pass, and trying to silence the people who are standing up for their rights? Think about other issues on the ballots and where this will lead in the future...

I encourage you to educate yourself on this Amendment and make a decision you are comfortable with. Above all, please, please, PLEASE have some trust in your local school district and know they are doing anything and everything to support, teach, and care for your children.

Knox's Story: Part 2

I previously wrote a post about Knox's birth story. If you missed it, click here to read it. As you know, it did not go as well as I had hoped. I had a bad experience, and mine may or may not have been an isolated event for the particular hospital/doctor. I've always been pretty open with people when they ask about my birth story, giving as many details as one would like, discussing the disappointing parts, but ultimately highlighting the fact that I got through it and Knox was safe, healthy, and happy. Until now, I haven't shared the second part of our journey with many people. Unfortunately, my bad experience with doctors did not stop at the birth of our first son.

When Knox was almost a month old, we packed up our belongings and moved to Osceola. We had accepted jobs here while I was still pregnant, and started looking for a house to live in. We actually missed the closing on our house because I was giving birth. Luckily for us, our realtors and bankers were very understanding and let us sign the paperwork in at the bank in Milan, getting it notarized. Small-town living at its finest.

Upon arrival in Osceola, I started thinking of all the things that never occurred to me before, including the question: Where do I even start looking for a pediatrician? We knew we weren't going to be in Milan very long after Knox was born, so we were okay with him having the on-call doctor when he was born. Thankfully, we were assigned an awesome pediatrician who we loved. The down side? He wouldn't be Knox's pediatrician for long.

I wanted someone who would be open to holding off on vaccines as long as we needed. We didn't know if that would be 1 year, 5 years, or forever! All we knew was that we didn't want to give him any for at least the first year of his life. I started looking for pediatricians in the area, and reading reviews on each. I wanted a D.O. as I know they are more open to holistic medicine. There were only a few in the area.

I picked up the phone and called one who had awesome reviews online. The receptionist answered, and I asked if this doctor was accepting new patients. She said yes. My next question was, "Is he open to waiting on vaccinations? My son has not been vaccinated and I am not interested in getting any for a while." She assured me that he was open to this mindset. I made the appointment.

I hung up the phone, feeling proud of myself for finding someone so easily who would see my unvaccinated child. And everyone told me I couldn't do it. 

It was a Wednesday. I took off a day of work to go to the appointment. My mother-in-law came with me to help with Knox if I needed it. We got to the waiting room. We waited. And waited. And waited. Finally, Knox's name was called. I got to the room and stripped him down to his diaper. The nurse measured him and weighed him. She said to leave him in his diaper and the doctor would be in soon.

We waited. And waited. And waited.

Finally, the doctor came in. He shook my hand, introduced himself. He had Knox's chart in his hand. He sat in a rolling chair. I was standing by the table, where Knox was laying, still in his diaper.

He started talking, and I thought it was odd that he wouldn't get near my little 4-month-old. I mean, not even close enough to touch him. He stayed back at least 5 feet. I assumed he just wanted a history, no big deal.

The more he talked, the more I realized something was up. He started talking about vaccinations. Now I knew what was going on. He pulled some pamphlets out of Knox's file on vaccines and gave them to me. He kept repeating himself, saying things like, "pediatricians are held to a higher standard." And, "I'm in charge of the well-being of a child from birth to 18 years." And, "I believe vaccinations are an important part of a child's health."

This went on for a while. I'm not sure how long, as I got really flustered. I'd say it was probably 15 minutes. The whole time, Knox laid on the table in just a diaper. After he started repeating himself for the third time, my mother-in-law stepped in and said, "So if I understand you correctly, you aren't going to see Knox today?" He responded by saying, "I just don't feel comfortable starting a relationship with a patient if I can't continue care for him."

He then started repeating himself AGAIN. My mother-in-law said, "We understand what you're saying. We are educated people and don't need you to repeat it again." Then she started dressing Knox.

The only thing I could mutter was, "When I called to set up an appointment, I specifically asked if you would be open to seeing an unvaccinated patient. The receptionist told me you were."

His response? "We tell them to say that so we can get you in here and give you information on vaccines." I told him that I wish I would have known that before taking off a day of work and driving over an hour to get to the appointment. But that's okay, because he told me he wouldn't charge for the visit.

WHAAAAT?!?

SO. Nice of him.

We packed up and walked out, leaving his precious hand-outs on the exam table.

Here were my afterthoughts, and what I really wish I could have thought of in the moment to say to him:

~If you care so much about the well-being of all children, why won't you even get near my kid? You have a child laying on your exam table, right in front of you, and you won't check him out?

~You believe it is unethical to start a relationship with a patient who you know you can't continue that relationship with, but it is ethical to intentionally lie to people to get them into your office so you can force your beliefs on them?

~You think vaccinated children are the healthiest, but I hear a kid in the next room coughing and hacking (who I can only assume is vaccinated since you are seeing them), and my child has never been sick. (Which, by the way, even now at 2 years old, I can count on one hand the number of times Knox has been sick).

~Finally, no, this visit was not 'free of charge' for me. I lost a day's wage to take a day off work to get to the appointment, and then spent gas money to drive over 2 hours round-trip. But thanks for not charging me for what you called a 'visit.'

I honestly wish I knew who I could report the doctor to. I'm sure there is someone to report to when a doctor is being unethical. He admitted to me that they blatantly lie to their patients.

So this was the second healthcare letdown I had in Knox's life. I just want to reiterate that I am not against doctors and hospitals. I know that many many people have great experiences, but I also know that my story isn't the only one like it out there. I'm very thankful for medicine and doctors, because there are emergencies that require serious care. What I learned from these experiences is that I know my child better than any doctor. I don't need someone to look at my child from 5 feet away and tell me if he is healthy or not. I am glad to have hospitals and doctors if Knox were to ever get ill and I don't know how to handle it. But for now, we will keep using essential oils, homeopathics, and feeding him a healthy diet as a preventative.

How I Chose a Midwife

As you know, I did not have the most pleasant experience giving birth to Knox.  I've mentioned that I am using what I learned to help me this time around. 

I decided, long before getting pregnant for the second time, that I wanted my next birth to be different. Honestly, I probably decided this shortly after having Knox. Although I wanted it to be different, I didn't really know what that meant. I knew I wanted to try a VBAC (vaginal birth after cesarean), but looking back, I pictured that happening in a hospital with a doctor who was willing to give it a try.

You should know (if you read my previous post) that I had trouble breastfeeding with Knox. We packed up and moved to Osceola when Knox was barely 1 month old. We were away from all the medical professionals in Kirksville who knew who we were. We had no pediatrician yet, and I was out of people to look to for help with breastfeeding.

While pregnant, I read Ina May's Guide to Childbirth (great resource for anyone wanting to have a natural childbirth!) and Ina May's Guide to Breastfeeding (by the way, Ina May is a Midwife), and I remembered how much she talked about helping new moms with breastfeeding. I began looking for midwives in the area as a last resort for someone to help. I found a list and furiously typed out a desperate-sounding email to the first lady on the list. She replied with the name and email address of a doula in my area who could possibly help.

That doula came to my house personally and helped with Knox's latch. I felt a lot more confident after she left, but she continued to email me to check on me a couple times a week at first. I am very thankful for her, as she answered a lot of questions over the following months. One of the questions being, "who do I see for a pediatrician if I don't want to give vaccinations?" She suggested I see a midwife (different from the first one I emailed), and gave me the contact information for one she knew of who did well-child checkups.

I set up an appointment with Brenda Abercrombie, and she saw Knox right away. Our first appointment with her was 2 hours long. Usually when you tell someone you were at the doctor for 2 hours, it's because of waiting (because you may see the doctor for 10-15 minutes of that 2 hours). With the midwife, the 2 hours was face-to-face contact with Brenda. Before even seeing Knox, she wanted to know how my pregnancy was, the birth story, why I chose no vaccinations, anything about him up until that point in his life. She was very thorough and actually listened intently, rather than rushing from one patient to the next. She drew blood to check my thyroid. She wanted to watch Knox breastfeed to check his latch.

I told her about my experience with the pediatrician in Springfield. She wasn't surprised. She told me that a few years ago, all the doctors in Springfield got together and agreed to not take on any patients who were unvaccinated. Interesting.

I knew after that visit that I wanted to use Brenda as my midwife for my next birth. I probably would  be able to find someone to 'try' a VBAC, but in the end, I knew I would get little support from that doctor. I just knew that if I went that route, I would end up with another c-section.

During Knox's next check-up with Brenda, we talked about using a midwife for a VBAC. I was nowhere near ready to think about having another baby, as Knox was just a few months old, but I wanted to have a plan for when it did happen again. After that visit, I had my mind made up...a midwife it would be for my next birth.

Here are some reasons I chose a midwife, and why no one should be worried about me using a midwife:

1. Common beliefs. With an ob/gyn, I felt like I was always going against the advice given. I was constantly written prescriptions that I never filled. I listened politely to recommendations to treat symptoms, only to go home to look up more natural solutions. With a midwife, I can tell her my honest opinion and I know she actually cares about what I have to say. We both agree that a drug-free, natural childbirth is best for the baby. Ultimately, that is the goal for both of us. 

2. Quality of care. I thought it was interesting to see this post from parents magazine on Facebook: 

Every appointment I've had, I feel like I am the main focus. There is rarely any other patient waiting. I remember being disappointed because I wanted to talk to the doctor when I called the office with a question, or when I was in labor and a million things were running through my head. With the midwife, I call or text her directly with any questions I have. And I know she will be there when I need her during labor as well. 

3. Knowledge. I'm amazed every time I go to a check-up with the knowledge my midwife has. 

4. A positive approach. I remember my first appointment with the ob/gyn. They went over a long list of things to stay away from...diet soda, undercooked meat, raw eggs, lunch meats, etc. I never got that lecture from my midwife. Instead, she gives me things TO eat! For example, she talked about the importance of protein, something I never once heard from my ob/gyn. With Knox, I was pretty much told any prenatal vitamin is good. Now I know that a natural (vs. synthetic) prenatal supplement is best, as your body is more able to absorb it. It's nice to know how to eat to best benefit my growing baby. 

5. And finally, because it's fun to see the looks I get when I tell people I'm using a midwife. No, I'm not having a home birth. I will be having the baby in a birthing clinic, just blocks away from a hospital in Springfield. This is the best solution since I did have a c-section with Knox. I feel confident with my midwife because she was a nurse practitioner first. She isn't afraid to write a prescription if I truly need it, but I know she won't jump to that first. 

I'm so excited to give birth! I know there is a chance that things won't go as I hope, but I do know that I'm trying everything possible to have a healthy birth! 

Knox is 2!

I can NOT believe that our little boy is already two! We celebrated on Saturday with a Very Hungry Caterpillar themed birthday party. It is Knox's favorite book at the moment, and it seemed fitting. Here are some pictures from the party:

First, the food. It was really easy to figure out what to serve. I pretty much just followed what the book said. Since the hungry caterpillar is apparently not a fan of veggies, I did add some of those. I also served hamburgers and hotdogs, and had a couple more tags on those but I didn't get a picture.

                                   (I found these adorable butterfly shaped crackers...perfect!)

     (I grew the grass in one week. Just an FYI if anyone ever needs to grow grass...it grows fast!)

I made the cake and it ended up being a little busy for my taste. My favorite part was the caterpillar on top. I got creative this year and did a square layer on bottom with a round layer on top. I know, things got crazy, people. Here are pictures of all four sides...

Some of the decorations...

         (I used plates from the Dollar Tree to display pictures of Knox throughout his second year)

(I put pictures of Knox on the table under the gumballs. It was super windy so I had to weigh them down!)

(A complete fail was my balloon caterpillar on the ceiling. It was so windy that they kept falling down when we opened the door. This was the best shot I got...which was after I had to re-tape it a few times.)

(This was in the front yard, directing traffic to the back yard.)

(The wreath for the front door)

(Party favors for the kids. Inside were gummy worms, balloons, and a sucker. I also had coloring pages and crayons for them, but didn't get a picture of it)

(Everyone who came got to sign The Very Hungry Caterpillar for Knox. He has the board book, but he will be ready for the real thing pretty soon.)

And here are some pictures from the party...

(One of his favorite gifts was a pair of cowboy boots)

(sitting with his cousin)

 And lots of lollipop-eating!

We all had an awesome time, but especially Knox! We had perfect weather. It was really windy, but the temperature was great. It's so fun to see Knox get excited and be so happy. Here's a family picture we took at the end of the day...all smiles! And you can actually start to see baby #2 peeking out a little. Happy Birthday Knox!

A Baby Story

With Knox's SECOND birthday fast-approaching, it only seems right to reminisce a little. First of all, I can't believe my baby boy is pretty much 2. I remember holding my little baby in my arms and having people tell me to enjoy it because it goes by so fast. Yeah, yeah, I thought to myself. 

(This is Knox when he was one day old)

SO! Here we go! The story of how Knox made his grand entrance into the world. 

I remember going into my check-ups with a list of a million questions. One of the first questions I asked my doctor was how she supported natural births. I wanted a completely drug-free pregnancy and birth. I wouldn't even take Tylenol for a headache during pregnancy.  She assured me that she felt the more natural, the better. I asked if I would have breastfeeding support and she told me there was a lactation consultant at the hospital 24/7. 

Knox was born on a Tuesday. The Friday before, I had gone on my daily walk. I walked to the school to see everyone who was teaching summer school. We stood around and talked for a while. I noticed my back was hurting really bad but figured it was from standing for so long. When Cody and I got back to the house, I talked to my mom. She was very worried that I may be having back labor. Her sister had that and ended up delivering my cousin in her apartment. 

Reluctantly, I called the hospital. They said to come on in...it wouldn't hurt to get checked out. In my head, I refused to become that woman who goes to the hospital 8 times thinking she's in labor. So, I told Cody to go ahead and shower. We took our time getting to the hospital. When we got there, I got hooked up to the monitor and I was having contractions. I wasn't feeling them around front like a normal person would. They weren't very strong, not strong enough to be in full blown labor, so we went home. (Oh, and we got pulled over for no reason on the way home. Cody wasn't speeding...it was late so I think they were checking for drunk drivers) 

Over the next few days, I continued to go on 1-2 walks a day. My back hurt really bad but I just dealt with it. I had my weekly appointment that Wednesday so I was just trying to make it until then. Unfortunately, when I woke up on Tuesday, I couldn't take it anymore. My back hurt so bad that I couldn't get comfortable in any position. I called the doctor's office to see if my ob/gyn could see me a day early. They said she was on-call at the hospital, but I could go over there and she could check me out in her spare time. 

So, yet again, we packed up the car. We checked in at the hospital and got hooked up to the monitor. Again, I was having contractions but I still couldn't feel anything in the front. 

The doctor came to check me. While checking me, I felt like I peed all over myself. She asked when my water broke. I looked at Cody super confused, looked back at the doctor, and said , 'just now?' She said it must have broke before, and that she just released it. I was thinking back to any sign that my water had broke before then and I couldn't think of anything. She kept pressuring me to give her a time, and finally asked what time I had woke up that morning. I told her 9:00. And she said she would write 9:00 down as the approximate time my water broke. 

At the time, I was really confused and excited and didn't think much of it. She told me I was dilated to 4, but that she couldn't feel knox's head at all. Again, strange, because at my appointment the week before, she had felt his head. 

The problem was that I had two water bags. The first had broken, but the second was still intact. She thought I would go into full-blown labor if the other water broke, but she wouldn't do it until she could feel the head.

Sooo she recommended pitocin. She thought the pitocin would enhance the contractions, pushing Knox down into the birthing canal. So, hesitantly, I agreed. There went the birth plan. 

I got hooked up to the pitocin, and prepared for intense contractions, as that's what I heard pitocin did. And so I waited. And waited. Still nothing. 

I walked the halls. I bounced on the ball. I walked some more. I walked for hours. Every 30 minutes they came back to increase the dosage of pitocin. Eventually it was on the full amount. The nurse told me to be prepared for extreme contractions with the full dose of pitocin. At that point I was ready for any sort of contraction. 

I got nothing. Still back pain. 

After being on the full dose of pitocin for about 5 hours (it could have been longer), I was still only dilated to 4. And knox's head was still nowhere to be found. 

We had been at the hospital for 12 hours with no change. The doctor came in and told me she recommended a c-section. She thought we could keep going like this until morning and I *might* be dilated to a 5, but at 9:00 (the time she pressured me to give her) they would have to do a c-section anyway because of risk of infection. 

I was devastated. 

So they prepped me for c-section. They rushed Cody off to get ready. I was all alone and upset. And pregnant. What an awful combination!! 

I got to the OR. Cody was still not there. I remember hearing them tell me to lay down on the other bed. Someone said, 'epidural right?' 

NO! NO EPIDURAL! I HAVEN'T HAD ANYTHING! DON'T START CUTTING ME!! 

Luckily, I didn't have to say any of those things out loud because someone set them straight. I had to get a spinal. Which freaked me out. 

Cody came into the room. With no camera. I was completely crushed! We would be missing out on once-in-a-lifetime shots! I probably started crying. Our saint, a.k.a. pediatrician, graciously went to our room and got my camera. Thank heavens for that man. 

A few minutes later, we heard a beautiful cry. The doctor said, 'whoa! That's a big baby!' And then lifted him over the curtain. I said, 'he's so cute!!' I just remember thinking a brand-new baby shouldn't be that cute. 

(Knox, showing his muscles within the first few minutes) 

They weighed him and then Cody left with him, leaving me with my doctor, nurses, and anesthesiologist. I was shaking really bad and kept asking if that was normal. I was freezing! The scariest part was hearing the nurses and doctor do periodic instrument checks: '4 scissors' '4 scissors, check'. I mean, it's good they were doing it but it just reminded me that something could possibly be sewn up inside me. 

It felt like it took absolutely forever, but when they wheeled me out, they were still working on Knox. They brought him to me (finally!!) and Cody and I got to have some alone time with him before the rest of the family came in. 

I got sick that night...I guess from the medication. They ended up leaving a bed tray for me just in case...which I later used to throw at Cody. Knox was crying, I couldn't feel my legs, Cody was asleep, and my nurse buzzer had fallen. It was my last resort to wake Cody up and it did the trick! 

I wondered why the doctor said Knox was so big when he only weighed 7lbs 12oz. I later found out that a 15.5 inch head is in fact not a normal size head for a newborn. It just means he's got big brains right?? 

I hated most of my birth experience. I absolutely loved being pregnant. I wasn't scared of a natural childbirth at all. But I feel like the doctor pressured me to give her a time when she accidentally broke my water. I don't feel like I was actually in labor and that I was forced to have an unnecessary c-section. 

After the birth, I still felt like I was unsupported. I had no help with breastfeeding. There was one nurse who had some patience to help Knox with his latch. We sent Knox to the nursery the second night because Cody couldn't sleep. I asked for them to bring him to me every 2 hours to try to nurse. I woke up and 6 hours had gone by. The nurse gave him formula, which I had specifically told them was not an option. I feel like my milk supply suffered from all of this, as well as knox's latch. 

I hated feeling out of control of my own body for so long. I couldn't feel anything from the waist down, which meant I couldn't even get up to take care of Knox at first. I also hated not having immediate skin-to-skin contact. Or even being able to touch Knox for so long. 

The icing on the cake was when I went in for my 2-week appointment with my ob/gyn. I was still having milk supply and latch problems. She asked what percentile Knox was in. I told her (it was low at that point). She said, 'obviously whatever you're doing is not working. You need to give it up.' Those words resonated with me and probably had a psychological effect on me the whole time. If she would have taken a more proactive approach, she could have checked out my thyroid and figured out it was playing a HUGE part in my milk production. 

There are many things I can look back and want to do different. But the fact of the matter is I can't change what's already happened. I can learn from my experience for this pregnancy (another post on that at a later date). And, when it's all said and done, Knox is here with us; and after a rough start, he is a very healthy, very happy almost 2-year-old. 

(I guess everyone was right...they do grow up so fast!)

Coming This December...

It's official!! We can now announce to the world that we will be expecting baby number 2 in December! We are super excited and nervous at the same time. I mean, what will we do with TWO?!?!

So far, it's been a lot of feeling sick and bloated. I haven't thrown up, but have been really nauseous the entire time. Hopefully that ends soon.

Knox is pretty funny about it. Sometimes he is super sweet and gives the baby kisses (and even high 5's....a.k.a. he smacks me in the belly). And sometimes we ask him if he's ready for a new baby and he straight up says "no." He will be almost exactly 2 1/2 when the new baby gets here so I think he will come around to the idea by then. He is really helpful around the house and when we visited my niece last week, he kept getting her sippy cup for her when she dropped it. I think he'll be pretty helpful when the time comes.

I know the question will be if we want a boy or a girl. I don't really care either way. A boy would be easy since we already have all the stuff but it would be nice to have one of each too. We will love him/her unconditionally either way.

I will try to post updates as we go along in this journey for the second time. Right now, we are just happy beyond words!

Gallbladder Cleanse

Apparently after you have kids, your body falls apart....

No one talks about life after pregnancy. Everyone loves telling the details of the 9 months of carrying your child, the pains of childbirth, and the immediate aftermath of the birth, but no one tells you how your body changes 6 months...1 year...2 years after having the kid.

One possibility I've noticed is that your immune system can just randomly start attacking things. My doctor described it to me like this: your immune system goes into a 'hibernation' mode during pregnancy to keep from killing off the fetus. When the baby is born, some women's immune systems go into overkill mode. I imagine mine looked like Al Pacino in Scarface after he says, 'say hello to my little friend,' and then kills everything in sight. 

So about 6 months after having Knox, I discovered my thyroid was pretty much non-functioning. A couple months after that, my liver started failing, but magically healed itself. My body's got skills, people.

Now, almost 2 years after having Knox, I am still feeling the effects. I've not been to a doctor, but webmd and I diagnosed my problems, coming to the conclusion that my gallbladder is not doing so hot. I wanted to just do a blood test, confirm it wasn't working, and have the thing removed, but apparently midwives and health professionals don't like to see organs removed from the body without a fight to keep them there.

So I was told to do a gallbladder cleanse. I decided to document my 3-day journey. Here we go...

First, the cleanse looks like this:

Day 1: eat only apples and pears, drink water and apple juice. Also take several supplements 3 times a day. 

Day 2: same as day 1, but right before bed, chug 4 oz of olive oil mixed with 4 oz of fresh squeezed lemon juice. Immediately lay down and in the morning you should pass any gallstones. 

Day 3: same as day 2, but you can eat something light, like soup, in the evening. 

Here is my account of the cleanse: 

Day 1: 

7:00 - Wake up, dang. My stomach is growling. I'm never hungry in the morning. My body must know I am not allowed to eat a good breakfast and is already fighting back. 

8:15 - Time for breakfast. I eat one apple and a little applesauce. I feel a decent amount of full. I take my supplements. GOODLORDALMIGHTY! What did I just swallow? I attempt to drink enough water to get rid of the aftertaste. No luck. Next time, I'll take them before the apples in hopes the apples will push them down.

9:00 - the taste is still lingering. I chew a piece of gum. I question whether this is cheating or not. At this point I don't care. 

10:00 - I'm wishing I waited until I was not teaching to do this. I can eat as many apples as I want, but can't eat while I teach. I feel like I would be happier if I were at home constantly munching on apples. 

10:45 - I feel bad for my students. Picture your teacher turning green saying, 'you won't like me when I'm hungry!' 

11:00 - finally! Lunch time! NOOOO!!! It's taco salad day! I reluctantly eat 1.5 apples. 

12:45 - I pass Cody in the hall. Almost ask him what he wants for dinner. Remember that the most interesting reply would have been, 'apples dipped in applesauce,' and bite my tongue. 

1:12 - I realize Pinterest will be off-limits for the next few days. It may as well be one big picture of tasty desserts and delicious foods. 

6:00 - finally home and ready to eat my weight in apples. Hoping to find something to keep me busy. 

7:42 - I muted the tv when a commercial for Sonic came on. Can I just go to sleep now?!?

9:21 - read Cody my recap of the day. Knox laughs at me while I read it. I proceed to tell him he did this to me. He laughs in my face. 

Day 2: 

7:00 - I'm up and around...feeling pretty good. I have a feeling today's going to be much better. 

8:00-4:00 - Work, work, work. It was pretty uneventful really. Today was a lot easier than yesterday. I drank more apple juice today, which I think helped keep me full. 

4:00 - To keep some sort of mystery, let's just say I'm glad I'm home....the cleansing has begun. 

9:00 - starting to dread the olive oil/lemon juice mixture. 

10:00 - the time has come. As advised, I mix the lemon juice and olive oil with an ice cube in the blender. Pour it into the glass... Wow, 8 oz suddenly seems to look like a gas station big gulp. I get up the courage to drink it. Tell myself it's lemonade. Here we go...holy burning esophagus, Batman! The taste? Not horrible. But the burn? Like I swallowed a match. I finish, just before I feel the urge to vomit, and lay down in bed. 

Not sure what time o'clock - I continually wake up throughout the night, running to the toilet to puke. Nothing comes up. At some points I'm not sure which end it'll come out (tmi? Possibly.). When I do lay down, my gallbladder feels 10 times bigger than normal and it feels like the lemon juice is just resting in my esophagus. I toss and turn, and at 7:00 decide to move to the recliner. And I thought today was going to be uneventful...

Day 3: 

Morning - I feel like I have the flu. Cody feels absolutely fine. This is so unfair. Apparently I needed this cleanse more than him. I thought it would be rough to not eat today. It's Saturday. Without work to distract me, I thought I would be tempted by the pantry all day long. There's absolutely no way that will be a problem. I feel like throwing up at the mention of any food. 

1:00 - I take a nap with Knox. I wake up feeling better and get busy cleaning windows.

4:00 - sweet relief! We can finally eat some soup. I enjoy part of mine...although Knox ate a good portion of it. We are almost done!!

9:00 - I rock Knox to sleep. I refuse to put him in bed. I know that when I put him down, I have to drink the lemon juice and olive oil again. Please, for the love of God, don't make me do it again! 

10:00 - everything is mixed. I put some apple juice in mine to make it sweeter, hoping to ease the sourness. Big mistake. It doubled the portion, only prolonging the misery. And the apple juice didn't make it sweet enough to change the taste by any means. I choke down about half of it. Keep in mind I have felt nauseous all day. I hit a mental block.  I can't tell myself to do it any longer. I take two more drinks and dump the rest. I'm afraid if I drink any more I will puke it all up. I lay down, dreading what may come tonight. 

Day 4:

7:00 - I wake up. It's light out. My stomach feels fine. I MADE IT!! I'M FREE!!! Cody and I happily eat a little breakfast, just happy to eat anything but apples. 

Last thoughts: 

This cleanse was really not as bad as I thought it would be. The worst part was definitely drinking the lemon juice and olive oil. I probably would have been ok with drinking it again if the first time didn't make me so sick. We started on a Thursday, which was a good choice. If we had to do it again, I would wait until summer when I wouldn't have to be at work at all. The apples and apple juice make your stomach all gurgly, and just really uncomfortable. I wasn't as hungry as I thought I would be. I'd recommend it to anyone who thinks your gallbladder is acting up. 

Weekend Getaway

Although the majority of our Spring Break consisted of track practice, check-ups, and a couple visits to the chiropractor, I did manage to get away for a couple days. 

I met up with a some friends in St. Louis  over the weekend. It was nice to have a just-girls weekend. And even though we enjoyed good food, good company, and lots of catching up, perhaps my favorite part of the weekend was having a bed to myself and sleeping in a little. It's the little things in life, right? 

We made a stop at Carter's. I have been looking for a quality pair of sandals for Knox and can't find any for his fat foot. They happened to be having a 50% off everything in the store sale. I snagged some jammies and sunglasses for Knox. I found the sandals on the way home at a different store. 

As always, it was great to finally get home. I missed my boys! I gave Knox all his new gear. He l.o.v.e.d. his sunglasses! 

 

When I put his new pajamas on later he wanted ALL of his new things on....

Then, when an impromptu trip to the in-laws arose (after he was in his pajamas of course), we had to keep him warm somehow. I don't know how you can look so ridiculous and so cute at the same time...

I guess he just wanted to show off his new gear :) 

SOOO now that we have some summer gear, we are ready for the warm weather...bring it on! 

Yet Another Update

I glanced over at my phone this morning, refusing to open both eyes. If I opened both eyes, then I would be admitting I was truly awake. I knew it was early, the sun wasn't up yet. I managed to find the button on my phone. Dang. Way too early. But with a stuffy nose and a sore throat, I couldn't find a comfortable position to get back to sleep. Don't you hate waking up early on the weekend?

I'm going to use the opportunity to give a much-needed update. I don't remember the last time I was Knox-free and work-free at the same time. He typically gets up when I do, and then falls asleep after me at night. To say he requires little sleep would be an understatement. 

So what have we been up to? Well! Cody has started track season. It's been interesting. You see, at the end of January, we sold his truck (following Dave Ramsey's advice). We decided to take the rest of the school year to save up for another vehicle. SO we are down to one vehicle, which isn't too bad considering we work at the same place. We forgot about the times when Cody has morning practice. Or when he has to take kids home from practice and there's a car seat in our back seat. But really, we are saving $300+ a month so those problems are minute in the grand scheme of things. 

As for me....I've been doing some projects around the house (I'm working on a 30 days of organizing post...very close to finishing), working, and enjoying the beautiful outside weather with Knox. 

Speaking of Knox (see what I did there??)....he has been learning so much! The kid still talks like Boo off of Monster's Inc. but he Is learning lots of new words. We started keeping a list, but it got to be too long. He knows well over 50 words by now, and attempts to talk in complete sentences (hence the sounding like Boo thing). 

Things Knox is working on at the moment...

-he has been riding his tricycle. He can make it go a couple times forward and backward before he gets frustrated. 

-anything sports and/or physical! We think he's going to be a basketball star because he can make some pretty good shots, but he could also be a quarterback because he has quite the arm on him. Then last night Cody decided he may be a baseball guy. Cody was holding the ball in his hand and Knox was smacking it with his bat, and not even hitting Cody's hand. 

-tools! Knox loves 'fixing' things. I think we make people nervous because he plays with real tools (not a table saw or anything) but he's always been really good with stuff like that. 

-WE are slightly working on potty training still. We don't want to push him because he's not showing he's completely ready. But he has made the choice to sit on the potty a few times and has gone in it several times too.

Here are a couple of stories:

One night, Cody was out late picking up pole vault poles for the track team. We have been trying to get rid of the pacifier, and I thought I would try the cut-off-the -nipple trick. My sister said her friend did it and her daughter never wanted it again. Sounded easy enough. He only has one good binky left, so I got one of the newborn pacifiers that he never used, and SNIP! He put it in his mouth, took it out, put it in, took it out, and gave me a dirty look. Then came a 10-minute lecture (God only knows what he was saying). I did hear the word 'da da' several times in there. I just kept explaining that it was broken and he needed to throw it away. Then he grabbed my hand and pulled me to the top of our stairs. I opened the baby gate, followed him down....past alllll the toys....and into the work room. He pointed to the tools. I gave him a small electric screwdriver. He marched right upstairs with it and spent a good 15 minutes trying to 'fix' his pacifier.....

I think this kid is too smart for us. 

Next story....picture this. I have been working for a while to get Knox to 'show me his muscles.' I hadn't tried it in a while so I gave it a shot the other day. 'Knox! Show me your muscles!' Knox smiled real big to show me all his teeth. Hmm. That's weird. 'Knox! Show me your muscles!' Again, he smiled and showed all his teeth. So I called Cody into the room to see what he was doing. Cody decided to give it a try. 'Knox! Show daddy your muscles like this...' I look over and Cody has his arms up showing his muscles and, for lack of a better word, was growling, bearing his teeth. SO I came to the conclusion that Knox was trying to do the same. So. Funny. Now he shows his teeth like that and puts his hands way up under his armpits. 

I have video of both of these stories. I couldn't get it to load on this blog, so I may have to just post it to Facebook. 

But I do have some obligatory cute pictures. The first is Knox and I taking a nap. The second is Knox in a hat my sister made him for his newborn pictures.  He found it somewhere in his room and came to me wearing it...so silly! 

Update

Just wanted to share some pictures that I've taken recently...

 

This picture was the result of snow day boredom! We had a big box of shredded paper and Knox loved it. The mess was 100% worth it...he had a blast!

Ha! Love this picture. Knox recently started wanting to pick out his own clothes. Usually he does pretty good but on this day he picked out shorts and a hoodie. It has been so cold in our house. We turned down the heat because of propane prices (didn't everyone?). So we put his slippers on him. And not sure about the hat...he just loves it and likes to wear it for no reason sometimes. 

I took this yesterday. We went over to Cody's parent's house after church. He loves to play the piano. He always wants the light on and then turns the pages of the book as he plays. He plays the keys so softly, and doesn't bang on them like you would think a kid his age would. 

 

I took a few pictures this morning when Knox woke up. He found this little pacifier the other day. It's actually his first pacifier...it used to be so big in his mouth. Now look at it! Not ok! 

He likes to say 'cheeeeeese' now when we take pictures. 

Not sure what was up with his hair this morning. It was sticking straight up like that. Also notice the Rudolph nose. He fell at church yesterday. Fell on his nose and got a rug burn on it. Aaand you may be able to see his chipped tooth. It's his top, front tooth (the right one when you are looking at it in the pic). Not exactly sure how it happened...or when...but he is definitely an accident waiting to happen. 

Last picture! Another snow day experiment. I had seen this idea on Pinterest. Not quite a success, but not exactly a fail either. We created a baby hammock using my moby wrap and our kitchen table. I don't know how to make it stay tight. After he gets in it, it slides down to the floor pretty quickly. It could also be because he's huge!! He started standing still long enough to stand by himself on the scale. He now weighs between 30 and 31 pounds. I'm thankful he's growing but sad he's getting so big so fast!