How I Chose a Midwife

As you know, I did not have the most pleasant experience giving birth to Knox.  I've mentioned that I am using what I learned to help me this time around. 

I decided, long before getting pregnant for the second time, that I wanted my next birth to be different. Honestly, I probably decided this shortly after having Knox. Although I wanted it to be different, I didn't really know what that meant. I knew I wanted to try a VBAC (vaginal birth after cesarean), but looking back, I pictured that happening in a hospital with a doctor who was willing to give it a try.

You should know (if you read my previous post) that I had trouble breastfeeding with Knox. We packed up and moved to Osceola when Knox was barely 1 month old. We were away from all the medical professionals in Kirksville who knew who we were. We had no pediatrician yet, and I was out of people to look to for help with breastfeeding.

While pregnant, I read Ina May's Guide to Childbirth (great resource for anyone wanting to have a natural childbirth!) and Ina May's Guide to Breastfeeding (by the way, Ina May is a Midwife), and I remembered how much she talked about helping new moms with breastfeeding. I began looking for midwives in the area as a last resort for someone to help. I found a list and furiously typed out a desperate-sounding email to the first lady on the list. She replied with the name and email address of a doula in my area who could possibly help.

That doula came to my house personally and helped with Knox's latch. I felt a lot more confident after she left, but she continued to email me to check on me a couple times a week at first. I am very thankful for her, as she answered a lot of questions over the following months. One of the questions being, "who do I see for a pediatrician if I don't want to give vaccinations?" She suggested I see a midwife (different from the first one I emailed), and gave me the contact information for one she knew of who did well-child checkups.

I set up an appointment with Brenda Abercrombie, and she saw Knox right away. Our first appointment with her was 2 hours long. Usually when you tell someone you were at the doctor for 2 hours, it's because of waiting (because you may see the doctor for 10-15 minutes of that 2 hours). With the midwife, the 2 hours was face-to-face contact with Brenda. Before even seeing Knox, she wanted to know how my pregnancy was, the birth story, why I chose no vaccinations, anything about him up until that point in his life. She was very thorough and actually listened intently, rather than rushing from one patient to the next. She drew blood to check my thyroid. She wanted to watch Knox breastfeed to check his latch.

I told her about my experience with the pediatrician in Springfield. She wasn't surprised. She told me that a few years ago, all the doctors in Springfield got together and agreed to not take on any patients who were unvaccinated. Interesting.

I knew after that visit that I wanted to use Brenda as my midwife for my next birth. I probably would  be able to find someone to 'try' a VBAC, but in the end, I knew I would get little support from that doctor. I just knew that if I went that route, I would end up with another c-section.

During Knox's next check-up with Brenda, we talked about using a midwife for a VBAC. I was nowhere near ready to think about having another baby, as Knox was just a few months old, but I wanted to have a plan for when it did happen again. After that visit, I had my mind made up...a midwife it would be for my next birth.

Here are some reasons I chose a midwife, and why no one should be worried about me using a midwife:

1. Common beliefs. With an ob/gyn, I felt like I was always going against the advice given. I was constantly written prescriptions that I never filled. I listened politely to recommendations to treat symptoms, only to go home to look up more natural solutions. With a midwife, I can tell her my honest opinion and I know she actually cares about what I have to say. We both agree that a drug-free, natural childbirth is best for the baby. Ultimately, that is the goal for both of us. 

2. Quality of care. I thought it was interesting to see this post from parents magazine on Facebook: 

Every appointment I've had, I feel like I am the main focus. There is rarely any other patient waiting. I remember being disappointed because I wanted to talk to the doctor when I called the office with a question, or when I was in labor and a million things were running through my head. With the midwife, I call or text her directly with any questions I have. And I know she will be there when I need her during labor as well. 

3. Knowledge. I'm amazed every time I go to a check-up with the knowledge my midwife has. 

4. A positive approach. I remember my first appointment with the ob/gyn. They went over a long list of things to stay away from...diet soda, undercooked meat, raw eggs, lunch meats, etc. I never got that lecture from my midwife. Instead, she gives me things TO eat! For example, she talked about the importance of protein, something I never once heard from my ob/gyn. With Knox, I was pretty much told any prenatal vitamin is good. Now I know that a natural (vs. synthetic) prenatal supplement is best, as your body is more able to absorb it. It's nice to know how to eat to best benefit my growing baby. 

5. And finally, because it's fun to see the looks I get when I tell people I'm using a midwife. No, I'm not having a home birth. I will be having the baby in a birthing clinic, just blocks away from a hospital in Springfield. This is the best solution since I did have a c-section with Knox. I feel confident with my midwife because she was a nurse practitioner first. She isn't afraid to write a prescription if I truly need it, but I know she won't jump to that first. 

I'm so excited to give birth! I know there is a chance that things won't go as I hope, but I do know that I'm trying everything possible to have a healthy birth!